Did you just experience a break up? Do you feel depressed and want to get your ex back immediately? Most people experience this in their life and it is common that you ask yourself “how can I get my ex back?”.
You may feel that life is dull and experience extreme loneliness after a breakup, and most likely, you may feel you miss your ex so much that you want to call her/him right away, but unfortunately, doing this will only push your ex further away than before. Relationship experts say that calling your ex constantly and begging to get them back is the worst thing that you can do. This will show them that you aren’t independent and extremely clingy.
What should you do instead then? Should you just stay at home and cry all day long? No! Should you call your ex and tell him or her how much you love them? No! What you SHOULD do at this point is actually the opposite. Simply follow the three steps below and you will find that it’s easier to get your ex to come back to you than you think.
Step 1 – How to get back with your ex: Accept the Facts!
First of all, accept that you guys are broken up and think about what happened. Let your ex know that you’re okay with it. This will begin the “moving on” process. Both of you will need some time to reflect upon what happened – both good and bad. At the same time, you will feel that a lot of the tension and stress will begin to disappear. Your ex will also need some time to think about the relationship, and this will give you some time to think about what you want to do as well. If your ex realizes that he or she made a mistake, they will call you.
Step 2 – How to get back with my ex: Do not contact your ex!
Do not try to contact your ex anymore. This even includes texting or emailing. You need to cut off all communucation with him or her so there can be some “reflection time”. You may be thinking that by doing this, your ex will think you don’t care anymore. Although this may seem like the wrong thing to do, you want them to know that you’re doing just fine and that you have moved on.
This will also make them think about all the good things more than the bad things that have happened in the past, causing them to miss you greatly. Sometimes, separation is the greatest medicine, your ex will realize how much they still need you.
Step 3 – How to get back with my ex: Plan to Meet Up!
Now to take a deep breath and take action. At this point, you probably know what you want to do – do you really want to get back together with your ex? You can begin talking to him or her again without making things too awkward. Discuss and plan for a good meeting place. Also, more importantly, think about what you should say before you go to see your ex.
I believe that these are the core steps to mending any broken relationship. There are definitely many more things that can be done, but this is a very good start without being too overwhelming. Start with these steps, and try your best not to contact her during the separation period. Things will begin to unfold itself and you’ll know exactly what to do next. 
thanks isabel, my friends tell me the same thing.I stopped talking to him. He still texts me and send me pic. of nice stuff but i dont reply to them. I am upset when i asked him if he doesnt want to see me to let me know and he didnt answer me, so i know my answer to the question. He has never told me to my face that he wants to breakup, he always stops talking to me and i wonder what is going to happen with the relationship so i would call him and we would talk again. I’m not doing that anymore. I am tired of trying.
hi sandra,
It sounds like he is either just holding you as a backup while seeing others or he is confused of what he should do as well. I think the best thing you can do now is to ask him clearly what he thinks of you two but not going out with him with two confused minds. Tell him what you want to do as well. You need a clear answer.
He gets mad when i ask him questions like, are you seeing someone? And he leaves and does’nt call me for a day and then we go out and finds a topic to talk about and he gets mad again and wants to leave. He confuses me. He tells me that he loves me but i dont know what to believe anymore. We broken up before and get back together.
ok how does this work with a 10 month old involved? I kinda have to be around her for my son
he tells me i don’t make him happy anymore then he will say i wish you would change your attitude cause i want to be happy with you. now i got to thinking is he confused or me .
to Kays: for the first 2 steps, i think at least give it a week and see how thing goes. I’m sure you want him back very bad now and since its been 2 weeks already, did he contact you by any means yet? If you still think he is the one after all these time, maybe send him a text or email first just asking how’s everything going with him. Don’t be needy and try to be confident when u talk. If he still loves, im sure he will reply and you can work from there. Sometimes guys are shy and your ex may not know whether you have moved on so making the first move if you really miss him.
To Adjua:
this is usually a harder situation since it sounds like your ex has thought of letting go and moving on. I understand that you may feel extremely lost now but think carefully whether it is worthy to make all the efforts to take him back.
Give yourself some time going out with friends and occupy your time. Go for a little trip if possible.One trick i find useful is to write down all the important things you want from a relationship and use them as criteria to value if your boyfriend will be “the one”. If you still want to get him back after this, try to show him your confident and bright side and he will know how wonderful you are. Send him an email first and see how he responses.
That’s definitely a tough one… unfortunately, if there’s a kid in the picture, in my opinion you’re going to have to do what’s best for the kid. Just give it some time, and don’t make the environment awkward for him/her…
Keep an eye on signs from your ex and see what he really wants over time.
ok you say dont call them but would if there is a kid in the middle he tells me that he loves me but not in love with me and that he wants someone to make him happy. he already told me that he has been talking to other girls and that i should just know it will never work out. so what should i do
ok. step 1, step 2 for how long? It is so difficult; because we used to talk every day and see each other practically every day. He lives around the block. And with Step 3 when to plan and meet up. I want to talk and get together on a casual basis; and eventually I want to be back in a better and stronger relationship with him. Please help and clarify these for me. Tx. Really trying to be patient and wait for him to contact me. I know we haven’t been broken up for long- only 2 weeks.